Wishes

This is going to be a 'repeat' of an old entry....I need to come here more often and the more often I come, the easier the psoting will be, yes??

I wish.....I could figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life. Right now I wish that I had done soooooooo many things differently.

I wish.... I was independently wealthy. I don't want to have more money than Bill Gates - just enough that I could be comfortable and do what I want, when I want and help others when I want.

I wish....I could find what the BaldMan and I lost. I don't think I will and that's ok. It will be better for both of us soon.

I wish....I wasn't such a source of worry to my friends and family. Although I DO think that once I resolve the situation above that I will get back to being the me I used to be and hopefully this will reduce the amount of worrying being done on my behalf.

I wish.....I could just go back to school full time and not have to worry about the financial part of it.

I wish.....I could go back to the place in Naples where we vacationed a couple of years ago. It was one of the best vacations I've ever had.

I wish....I could be a mommy. I mean physically be a mommy. I would give my left arm and any other parts anyone might be interested in if I could get pregnant and feel that miracle inside me.

I wish....I could fly. ( You knew I would mention it didn't you??)

I wish...I could go back in time and tell my grandfather that smoking was bad for him - and that he would believe me.

I wish....the Fig would marry me =) He IS my next husband you know.

I wish....I could sleep. Instead I'm here posting!


Ok, that's enough for now. I'm going to try to get some sleep. I'm going to the Mushroom Festival this weekend with the parental units. Yeeha!

Weird Stuff

I know I said that I would update more often - ha! I'll do my best. I have so many blog posts popping into my head some days but then I just don't feel like writing when I get to the puter. I guess lots of people do that. I must be in good company eh?

Ok....I did have surgery last month to try to alleviate some of the mystery pain that I had been dealing with. The doc found about 15-20 endometriosis 'blisters' (technical term ya know) and blasted them with a laser. How could I still have those suckers you ask??? I did too. The doc said that sometimes even without the hormones ( I had my hormone producing ovaries removed in 2005) some people still have enough hormone floating around in their bodies to produce some blisters. I also had lots and lots of scar tissue in there. They had to call in a second surgeon to come in and assist with removing that from my bowel, colon and vaginal wall. Long story short, had surgery, hurt like a mofo, came home, hurt some more, still hurts 4 weeks later.

In other non-related news.....I still have an un-natural love for spaghetti sauce. Tasty will be happy to note that I only have 4 jars in the pantry even as we speak! It's some good stuff from Harry and David that I found on sale at the outlet mall. Yes, I know I'm weird - buying spaghetti sauce at the outlet mall. Heck, I even bought some of the 'famous' Harry and David pears (of course I did!) whilst I was there. Lemme tell ya - those things are YUMMY.

I'm Baaaaaaaaccccckk!

Not that anyone missed me or anything.



I had another blog once upon a time. I tried to log in to my old blog but the email address I used was 3 email addresses ago! This one will be a fresh start! This is my new and improved version. That's my theme for this year, I think. This 2008 is going to be my year of fresh starts. I think that's exactly what I need. This will be the year I get a fresh start with a new career, getting healthier, getting my relationships where I want them to be and just doing the things that I want to do not because I have to them. This is the year of me.



Let's do a quick update about what's happening here in my world and then we'll see where this thing takes us.



First of all, I am unemployed at the moment. Thank you, Jesus! That crazy woman I was working with at Lapeteet (spelled wrong on purpose) was working my last nerve for so long, I wasn't sure I had any nerve left. That is until I walked out that Monday morning without notice, without a word. I'll go more into that later.

Second, I'm waiting to have surgery again. Some of you know that I had a hysterectomy in February 2005. Even though I'd had everything removed, I was still having pain. So, after dealing with it for almost 3 years, I've decided to do something about it. Go me!

Thirdly, I am the proud 'mommy' to 3 furbabies who I love madly. There's my big girl, MollieMae. She was our first baby, She's a mixture of something with that other thing and what we got was the sweetest, most lovable 65 pound ball of fur you ever saw! Then, there are my 'twins'. I don't think they really are twins (can dogs be 'twins' since they're all born in a litter??). Gus and Gertie are Shih Tzus. I found them walking down the street in my neighborhood. I enticed them into my car using french fries from White Castle of all places.

Fourthly, I am in a strange place with regard to my marriage. Don't get me wrong, I love the BaldMan. I truly do love him. I just don't know if I am IN LOVE with him anymore. It's the oldest saying but, he's not the guy I married. Or, quite possibly, I'M not the guy I married. I think there have been a lot of changes for both of us these last 6 years.



So, now I'm back. I'm gong to try my darndest to update often, to try to figure out how to post pictures, to be positive, to keep up with old friends, to make new ones, to make with the funny, to be positive, to let y'all see me without my 'Oscar' shell on, to be honest with you and most of all me.